“I feel your pain.”
This is not the same thing as, “I know how you feel,” something I would avoid saying for the reason that even if you’ve shared a similar incident, every person’s journey is uniquely their own.
These words, “I feel your pain,” however, is an expression of empathy.
According to renowned authors Raymond Mitsch and Lynn Brookside, the words “I feel your pain” are the most helpful words that can be said to a grieving person.
“How about a hug?”
Not every person is touchy-touchy, but for some people when they grieve they feel like they are starved of hugs, they feel like hugging anyone who comes their way even pets.
So when a friend has lost a loved one and is feeling lonely asking them for a hug may sound pitiful but that’s exactly what they need at that very moment.
It wont take the paid away but help them cope with the changes.
“I’m sorry for your loss.”
It’s honest, direct and straight to the point. It shows you care. “I’m here for you.” When people grieve they don’t want to be around people who see through them but people who will see them through the tough times, therefore one of the best things you can do for a grieving is to be available in and be their for them in whatever capacity they may need you.
“How are you doing?”
Ask your friend then carefully listen to the answer he or she gives you. Later after the hurting period they will be comfortable around friends who checked on them frequently.
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